Thai Political Lexicon Part I (note: satire warning!)

Here are a few items in the Thai political lexicon which might confuse newcomers to the Kingdom. On the left is the Thai version rendered into English and on the right is the actual meaning:

Checks and balances: stuffing the bureaucracy so full of social conservatives who owe their positions to patronage that no meaningful political reform is possible.

Enemies of the state (© Abhisit Vejjajiva): pro-democracy demonstrators. Used to be ‘Communists’ or anyone else deemed inconvenient or disruptive.

Unity: obeying the establishment without question.

Reconciliation: see ‘Unity.’

Setting up a committee to scrutinize the legislation: we made a mistake by hastily cobbling together some populist nonsense and now we would like to forget all about it by burying it for a year.

We hope the Cambodian legal system will abide by international standards: We hope the Cambodian legal system is better than the Thai legal system.

Happy Christmas: it is you foreigners who cause all the trouble, are seeking to undermine the Thai state, are probably Communists as well.

Transparents Lead the Way

After the latest round of Premier League games, the Bangkok Glass Transparents continue to lead the way, with 24 points from 10 games, followed by the Chonburi Land Sharks, Osotspa Dried Squids, Muang Thong Exhibitionists and Thai Port, who are fifth with 14 points. The Transparents maintained their position at the top with a 1-0 win over the Navy Blue Shirts. Last, still, are the Chula Hippocratic Oath Breakers, whose game away at the Exhibitionists was postponed. The Samut Sakhon-Land Sharks game was also postponed, presumably because of the extensive rainstorms over the weekend.

My team, Bangkok United, scored a valiant 1-0 win away at the Dried Squids (there are more video highlights available at the cheerballthai channel on Youtube, for those interested).

Meanwhile, in the First Division, the Thai Police Fee Collectors continue to lead the way, followed by the Thai Honda Reliables and the Suphanburi Monkey Banqueters (is that Suphanburi where they have the monkey banquet?). The Police appear to have scored a 7-0 (seven, in teleprinter speak) away at Surat Thani, which must be the result of the week if it is not a misprint.

Division Two is divided into five regional leagues, one in the North, one in the Northeast, one in South, one in the Central East and the fifth in Bangkok. Current leaders of these leagues are, respectively, Chiang Rai, Nakhon Rachasima, Satun, Singburi and Rachapracha. Is there a fully active pyramid structure in place? Not sure. Apparently, three will be relegated from the Premier League at the end of the year to be replaced by the top three in Division One, while the bottom five from Division One will be replaced by the top placed team in each of the five regional leagues. I say ‘apparently’ because this is the first season and, this being Thailand, the rules attached to any competition should probably best be thought of as a movable feast. Money and influence, in other words, might intervene to prevent certain teams from being relegated. We shall see how it transpires.