My Black-Hearted Mistake about the New Church Revealed

Apparently I am completely wrong about everything – well, I suppose I knew it all along. I had been complaining about the new church that is being built at the end of the soi – this was a perfectly justified complain to my mind on the following grounds:

Aesthetic – do we really need more churches in Bangkok?

Ideological – the baleful spread of medieval superstition

Practical – where will all the church-goers park their cars? Bangkok people do not walk anywhere (rumour has it they do not even walk upstairs in their own houses) and so there will be even more congestion on Sundays and movable feasts and the like, also weddings. Will there be funerals there? Is there a graveyard nearby or will these be some species of Christian that accepts cremation as an appropriate means for organizing post-death accommodation?

(Also, on practical terms, I am glad it is not a mosque because of the five times daily call to prayer that would entail – did I tell you about my sojourn in Kassala in a new house next to the mosque which had had donated state-of-the-art loudspeaker equipment capable of broadcasting the call to the nomads in the desert many miles away? The donation was in return for racing camels, but that is another story.)

Well, as I say, I have been declared wrong in all particulars since I am reliably informed by She Who Must Be Obeyed (senior and junior versions) that the aura arising from all those prayers will spread out across Ladprao and will bring luck to everyone. And we can use some luck (this being the unspoken subtext).

In any case, the outside of the church is nearly finished, it seems (I am not an expert in building) and the little steeple has some kind of crucifix on the top. Let’s see what brand of Christian they are – I suspect some kind of evangelizing God-botherers (and more importantly neighbour-botherers) since they are the only ones with money these days.